The Greatest of Love Stories End in Tragedy

Alfred Lord Tennyson once wrote "I hold it true, whate'er befall; I feel it, when I sorrow most; 'Tis better to have loved and lost Than never to have loved at all"... I've thought it over for several years but not until recently did I decide on the fact that I agree with what he said. No matter how much it hurts, I'd rather feel pain right now than to never have loved before. Thoughts?

My shelter

Don't you just love the feeling of having the sun straight at your face? But I still want Beirut to welcome the fall. Because no matter how much I love the feeling of the sun burning my face, nothing ever beats the feeling of cozing up in my blankets with hot choko and hearing the rain pour outside. Oh fall please come to me...

Candy'up

Kheloo my fellow readers!! It's only four o'clock but damn does it feel as if this has been the longest day ever!

Yesterday Gossip girl aired its season premiere episode. Me did not like. The only character I enjoy watching is the one I used to resent. Yup the one and only Dan Humphry. I knööw sööw weird! Oh and also.. Today the third episode of X-factor is airing and since I missed the first two episodes I really need to make sure I don't miss this one. Ya ya I probably sound like a tv nerd but dude it's like SIMON COWELL and boy do we love the Simon Cowell. Anyways up there is a picture from Khiam on the last day there. Can you see that smile? Yup you guessed it, it's as fake as all you people out there! XoXo BB's

Guess Who's Back

Khiam was actually not that bad! But let me tell you; it's good to be home. While I was there I had some kind of a bump in the road if I could call it that. I questioned my stay in Lebanon as all the people around me also did. I started thinking about what I really came here for. Was it really independance? Because I ended up living with my mum but I'm still here. So, Why am I? It's not becasue of anyone because there's no one left holding me back to this place and it's not becasue of fear of what others would think because frankly, right now, I couldn't care less. I can't explain it, but somehow it feels right. When I am walking the streets of beirut it feels right. When I am in the cab listening to the driver complain about the country and the people here, it feels right. When I am out late and people I do not even know act protective over me it feels right. It just feels right. I know my place right now is here. I can't predict the future nor can I say for certain that I am making all the right decisions. But I am making them for all the right reasons and for now that is all that counts. It also helps a tiny bitsy little that I have my soulmate right by my side; my baby sister.
You know you hate loving me, XoXo

Fabolicious

I packed. I went to the airport. Then straight to the hospital (4 am). Then I kept standing until 11 o'clock (with 10 cm heels). Then I came back home. No Khiam. I should be glad I didn't go but I'm not because my bebis and my doulo went there and now I'm home alone. And I do so HATE being alone. Anyways the reason behind me not going there was that my dad thought I needed some rest because I hadn't had any sleep for 2 nights. He was right so as soon as I came home, I went to bed and I have been sleeping until now.

Anyways now I'm up and I thought it would be a good idea to upload some pics from yesterday night. Isn't my bagpack just faboulous?

You know you Hate Loving me Xoxo

Actually, honestly, sincerly yadiyadi HAPPY

Ok.. maybe not THAT happy. I mean, don't you think he looks too happy? Makes me wanna give him a swollen lip !! Muaha I KID I KID!! Anyways I noticed I had only been seeing the bad sides of everything lately, including the fact of going to Khiam. Only looking at the bad sides I forgot to pay attention to the good stuff. Seriously, My dad whom I haven't seen in 8 months will be next to me in only a couple of hours. And the only thing I could think about doing was complain about the fact that I didn't wanna leave Beirut. Like MY DAD IS FREAKING COMING! So I'm kind of excited, no more than kind of.. I am TOTALLY excited about seEing him and having him spoil me a little. I.am.in.serious.need.of.spoiling.
You know you hate Loving Me Xoxoo

Gonna Put On a Smile & Go With iT

There are some things that I haven't been ready to face just yet. And I thought I wouldn't have to be ready to face them so it was all cool. However faith has intervened and made sure that I have to face them now, when I least can handle it. OH HOW NICE OF YOU, FAITH!



I got a call today from my dad and appearently my grandmother is very sick so he has booked the next flight down here and by tomorrow I will have to be in my lebanese hometown Khiam. HAPPY ME! NOT! Why oh whyyy please tell me why? Well I guess it's something I have to do so I am going to put on my happy face now and go pack some clothes! I'll keep you guys updated (and by you I mean the only two people who reads this blog. HAHA.) But for now, you know you hate loving me xoxoooo

Push

In my last entry I asked a question about wether or not you agree with "people always leave". The good news is I got a comment from someone! Yeey happy mee! The bad news is that it's someone who wishes to piss me off!! hmm I made them walk out on me? Which one? The best friend whom I considered a sister but according to her all I had been since 2009 was being someone not worthy of her friendship? Or maybe you mean the childhood friend that walked out without an explanation or even a sorry? No you probably mean the person whom I trusted wholeheartedly, only to have that person betray me; stamp on my trust, throw it to the dogs to chew on it then spit it out as a dessert for the cats!! Haaha No no it was probably the girl who started avoiding me because of her guy!! You want more? Because the list goes on and on... I've done tons of bad things, but none of those where intentional. In none of the cases did I MEAN to hurt the other person. But shit happens and I did but never ever have I betrayed someone, or walked out on a friend, especially when that friend had noone else. I aknowledged my mistakes and asked for forgiveness not like the one who walked away without even a sorry. Yeah, so I did not make them leave.. they left on their own so lets just have that fact straight! For now, you know you hate loving me xoxooo

People always Leave

I started blogging 2 years ago. Several reasons where behind it but mostly I was in not-such-a-good-place in my life and I needed a place where I could just write about anything I felt like writing about. There where times when I would stop blogging, like recently, and always for different reasons. Anyways here I am now, two years later, in the same not-such-a-good-place and I decided to start blogging again. Hmm.. people always leave... Do you agree?