On october 17 and Now

On October 17 I was torn between two choices... between settling and taking a leap. I wrote about it in my blog, I asked myself what I should do... should I stop hoping? I didn't have an answer. It was a really tough period for me, not knowing what to do I was really torn and I seriously thought about settling and try to forget but I couldn't... It wouldn't be fair to anyone... it wouldn't be fair to myself to live in a lie... So I decided against settling down because even though I felt there was no chance for me I still couldn't do it... I wouldn't... I've been cranky, nagging about everyhting, yelling all the time, fighting with everyone mostly my family... they all had a bad time because of me but I couldn't help it... I was a mess... Now a couple of days ago something happened that made it all worth it.. the yelling, the hurting, the crying everything.. it was worth it... And the thing is even if it hadn't happened I still wouldn't take back the choice I made that saturday because settling down is never right.. for anyone. It's better to live your life knowing you did your best then to live it knowing you gave up. I did my best and at the end of the day that's what really mattered.. Tshokaheee:D:D:D:D ...